Sacro Iliac Syndrome
I think I know when it happened and this is embarassing. I was at Happy Hour (that phrase alone says it all) and we were singing, dancing and having fun as usual. It's a nice way to end the weekend on a Sunday evening and head into the work week. At some point someone mentioned flexibility and on cue I announced that after ages, I can still do a split. Well I can dammit! This announcement is received with disbelief - I am in split-formation before my vocal cords stop vibrating.
The split went well, the problem was with Wayne. Wayne countered with, "But can you do this?" and fell into a frog seat, which is to say he kneeled the splayed his feet outward. My reaction, "HELL YES!" I remember thinking, "OW" at the time and when I got up.
Weeks later I was still favoring my right side and when it got to the point that I could not stand up straight quickly after sitting I began to worry.
I called my favorite doctor, who has a bromance with my husband and tried to make an appointment - upof course he was booked. They gave me another doctor, let's call him Dr. McHottie - you'll thank me later.
Being a neurotic, hypochonriac whiner I announced at work that I had self-diagnosed lupus, in George Costanza style.
I arrived at the doctor's office and sat patiently waiting for the D.O. Dr. Hunold aka Dr. McHottie came busting into the room and said, "We've met before, I never forget a pretty face." I was done. I did the stupid girl laugh and said, "Yes, you looked in on my husband when he was having some intestinal difficulties." He said, "He had the room with the view, right?" I nodded, "Yes, that's him." He got very serious and said, "How is he." I looked at him and said, "He lived, can we get back to me?"
Dr. McH asked why I was there and I explained that my right hip was killing me, quickly. He had me stand and looked. I asked, "Is it lupus? Is it lupus?" He was confused, obviously not a Seinfeld fan and said, "You don't have lupus." I spent the next 3 minute explaining the lupus episode much to my embarassment. He instructed me to sit on the table and told me to cross my ankle over my knee. Done. Then he pushed down on my knee and I screamed, "Jesus Christ!" He said, "That hurts?" I stared, "Yes it hurts!!" He smiled and said, "It's not your hip, you have sacro iliac syndrome." I turned and said, "How much time do I have doc?"
He told me to get on the table and then asked, "Do you mind if I manipulate your spine." I quickly answered, "I don't care what the hell you do, just fix my hip." My head was whipped around so quickly and crunchily that I wiggled my toes afterward to make sure I wasn't paralyzed. Then, "Give me your arm." I was resituated and then crunched again. "Turn over." I was twisted, cracked, and the icing on the cake was, "I'm going to lay on top of you." Okey dokey - What IS all that crunching?? I got up, felt like blood was flowing into places that had been damned up for years.
Today my hip feels better and it's almost back to normal. I started doing toothbrush squats at night while brushing my teeth. Deep squats - I'm up to 200 a night. Hopefully I won't choke on toothpaste froth or fall into the vanity. If I do, I know who I'll go see.
The split went well, the problem was with Wayne. Wayne countered with, "But can you do this?" and fell into a frog seat, which is to say he kneeled the splayed his feet outward. My reaction, "HELL YES!" I remember thinking, "OW" at the time and when I got up.
Weeks later I was still favoring my right side and when it got to the point that I could not stand up straight quickly after sitting I began to worry.
I called my favorite doctor, who has a bromance with my husband and tried to make an appointment - upof course he was booked. They gave me another doctor, let's call him Dr. McHottie - you'll thank me later.
Being a neurotic, hypochonriac whiner I announced at work that I had self-diagnosed lupus, in George Costanza style.
I arrived at the doctor's office and sat patiently waiting for the D.O. Dr. Hunold aka Dr. McHottie came busting into the room and said, "We've met before, I never forget a pretty face." I was done. I did the stupid girl laugh and said, "Yes, you looked in on my husband when he was having some intestinal difficulties." He said, "He had the room with the view, right?" I nodded, "Yes, that's him." He got very serious and said, "How is he." I looked at him and said, "He lived, can we get back to me?"
Dr. McH asked why I was there and I explained that my right hip was killing me, quickly. He had me stand and looked. I asked, "Is it lupus? Is it lupus?" He was confused, obviously not a Seinfeld fan and said, "You don't have lupus." I spent the next 3 minute explaining the lupus episode much to my embarassment. He instructed me to sit on the table and told me to cross my ankle over my knee. Done. Then he pushed down on my knee and I screamed, "Jesus Christ!" He said, "That hurts?" I stared, "Yes it hurts!!" He smiled and said, "It's not your hip, you have sacro iliac syndrome." I turned and said, "How much time do I have doc?"
He told me to get on the table and then asked, "Do you mind if I manipulate your spine." I quickly answered, "I don't care what the hell you do, just fix my hip." My head was whipped around so quickly and crunchily that I wiggled my toes afterward to make sure I wasn't paralyzed. Then, "Give me your arm." I was resituated and then crunched again. "Turn over." I was twisted, cracked, and the icing on the cake was, "I'm going to lay on top of you." Okey dokey - What IS all that crunching?? I got up, felt like blood was flowing into places that had been damned up for years.
Today my hip feels better and it's almost back to normal. I started doing toothbrush squats at night while brushing my teeth. Deep squats - I'm up to 200 a night. Hopefully I won't choke on toothpaste froth or fall into the vanity. If I do, I know who I'll go see.
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